What women want

I thought I might explain some things because I have been encountering some strange women. Not strange in the weird, space ship, mystery kind of way. But strange in the out of the ordinary, I’m not used to these type of women way. This phenomenon is notable only because it may or may not be affecting the way I date. How do I begin? Let me just say it as straight as possible. I think I am having a hard time getting to it because this is really a perplexing situation. There are lines which I don’t want to cross. I have been opening myself up to people I barely know and this is all new to me. So I guess I just have to bite the bullet and go for it. What have I got to lose? I keep meeting women who continually misrepresent themselves. 
That would be fine by itself except for the wild ways in which they misrepresent themselves and their response to my reaction or lack thereof to their behavior. In the end I am put out, because I lose the woman and don’t get anything out of it. Now I’m thinking I should explain how I approach dating. 
There are two types of datable women. There are keepers and there are one night stand types. The keepers are quite simply girlfriend material. They are the ones you actually take out in public on dates and what not. The one night types are just for getting fucked out. They may get down right away or later on down the line but getting freaked out is all they are about. 
So the problem I am having lately is the blurring of the lines between these two types of women. I am frequently encountering women who are the one night types but they come across as the keepers. Then there is internal conflict because I actually grow to like these women as women. Explanation time again. I am trying not to get into specifics but in most cases the issue is derived from women actually claiming they are keepers. This means I tend to make an actual effort to get to know the women. It also means I become a little more patient when it comes to sex. You see with keepers you want to build something. So that is what I focus on more than the sex. So, after some major chit chatting, phone calls, dates, quality time or some combination of the four, my mind is all over the place. I am completely unfocused on what I should be focused on. I still think of sex but I think of it in a different way. I think of the morning after and the next step. But in actuality, with these women there is no next step. This causes me to be less assertive. Less physical. I know how to be a man when I need to be and when to be mannish. Just ask my friends. I am always the one telling them they need to be more assertive. There are just a few lines I don’t cross. In fact I stay at least 50 feet away from those lines. Two things I never want to be are a stalker and a date rapist. 

So, I talk a lot of shit but in those real intimate situations I am a little more cautious. Obviously, that often conflicts with my role as a man and leader in a relationship especially during the intimate times. Women need a man to be the initiator (to steal a friend’s word on the same subject). I always am but I respond to women’s cues. If there is no cue, I don’t act. If there is a mixed signal, I don’t act. If things are unclear, I don’t act. All of this is to say I avoid date rape situations. I don't push for sex unless I see an opening. If I'm alone with a woman and she has her arms crossed, legs crossed but internally is hoping I make a move, I never will. If I make a move and get rebuffed, I won't make another. Years ago, no meant no. Today, yes means yes. Sexually, there's nothing happening without an explicit invitation. I am a straight forward guy. I know how to ask for what I want. 
I am also a gentleman. I don’t get into details because of that. I save all advances for intimate moments. I never want to misrepresent the lady I am dating at the moment. I understand women not wanting to be misrepresented or disrespected. In today’s society, women have the opportunity to control their dating scene to the most intimate detail. But their reputation is still at risk. Also, I don’t believe most men know exactly HOW to be gentlemen. Men try but etiquette is lost on recent generations.

As a result, it is more important for women to be careful of their reputation. But then there is a problem with a few ladies. These ladies don’t know how to be casual and still save their reputation. So they sell this dream of chastity and deep relationships when all they really want is to hook up from time to time. I see this as lying about who you are. That in itself is bad. In order for one of these women and I to relate I need to not only buy their dream but pretend I didn’t on two levels. Intimately I have to pretend to the girl that I am there with her on this magical dream of casual dating and chastity together. (Read: an open AND exclusive relationship) Then I have to pretend that I am not buying the dream she is selling. (I have to agree to be celibate but still try to fuck) But then I have to buy the dream this woman is selling in fact. And that is the third lie. (And they say men lie) Like I said, the only reason this is important is because lately I have caught myself buying some of these dreams. Not to mention the increasing numbers of these types of women. 
I hope I was clear on my dilemma. I probably ran out of space and wrote too much. WOMEN I need help. What the hell is going on? How do I stop myself from falling folly to these fake women? How do I avoid becoming fake myself?




Following are comments from the original MySpace Post:

I don't know if it's that these women are fake and I'm not so sure you should group it together under the description of these women being such.  Maybe some of them want the booty and want someone to settle with and be long-term with, but don't necessarily have to be involved with that particular long-term person to have sex with them, and possibly maybe they have just not found that - long-term quality in you so they keep it moving.  Granted some of them may be fake, but I think what you have to do is not look to overcoming falling for these types, but do as you are.  Take each one individually.  Regardless how respectful you are, how careful you are with each one, you are dating.  You will not no who's who and will not be able to rely on signs because each one, though lots of them may have similarities, are different.  Despite the details that you have pointed out, you're still dating and dating is nothing more than a game where you have to find the right one.  Get to know each of them and weed out the good one(s).  That's just my perspective.  I'm at work and don't have time to look over this and make sure I'm typing the ideas I'd like to reflect, so hopefully I've done so successfully.  Good luck in trying to make sorts of it all.  Love.

I'm sure you are right. As I was reading your response I came to realize that my problem is not the "fake thing" but the whole game. Why can't we all just be straight shooters for real, for real?

...because we run the risk of accidents and scars....

But by now isn't it obvious that those scars and accidents are unavoidable?

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW! Doggone, doggone, u write alot and have to say alot! I never knew these things from a POV. Doggone, doggone, it's really iinteresting that a man like u can right so f..doggone, doggone, pasi..sionately.