Raising The Level Of The Company You Keep

My facebook friend's list is extensive. There are very few 'friends' I haven't met in person. Oddly, I tend to run into those people after friending them on FB. It is truly collection of people I have met through my extensive travels.

In my younger days, I would have tried to hang with as many of those friends. As an adult, with a much stronger commitment to my priorities, I know that is not a great idea. Better than that, it's a horrible idea.

When I was younger I just liked the energy of being around different people. It didn't matter what kind of energy it was as long as I felt it. That has led me on an interesting journey. Today, I am more focused. The direction I head in is much more important. My 'friends' are all headed in a good direction. Everyone is not headed in MY direction. Even if you are on my level, or above, if you're not going my way, your energy could be a distraction to me. I have enough distractions.

Then there is the question of being on my level.
A chain is only as strong as its weakest link. In organizations/groups/social circles the only way to be on the same level is to lower one's standards. We tend to get caught up in the big fish small pond scenario. We stand out when we hang out with smaller people. We forget that we are stuck in the small pond with big dreams. My realization came in the midst of being compared to someone I considered a low-life. I had been a genius among morons when I knew my genius is much greater than
that. I am a man among men. I stand out in any crowd. It's worth it for me to pursue crowds of higher standards since I know I will continue to stand out.

In real estate, a good buy is the worst house in a good neighborhood. Some of us make the bad buy of the best house in a bad neighborhood. In the good neighborhood, the property values will continue to rise in the short term. In the bad neighborhood, the values will drop and may never rise, even in the long term...



Check your neighborhood.

My journey has taken me to the lowest of lows. I thrived. I have thrived in the middle. As I continue my forward and upward momentum, I continue to thrive. However, my momentum has slowed as I have tried to raise up people around me at the expense of my own progress and at the expense of their progress as well. By not moving on, I was blocking the way for
people around me to follow my path.

To be specific, I fell for the "book smart vs street smart" bullshit so many people came up with when threatened by my intelligence. To put people at ease, I lowered myself. I even ventured out to become "street smart." At the end of That journey, being "street smart" is really dumb. Or, at least, the way I went about it was. Almost as dumb as joining a gang. I became affiliated with criminals.

It was when my affiliations with other intellectuals became threatened when I noticed that I had weakened myself to essentially fit in...

The worst part of lowering one's self is not the loss of identity or lack of growth. It's the cost to the community at large. In addition to losing friends/associations, my community lost a leader for great while. I see the effects of my disappearance all over. In my family, in the family I was meant to build. In my community. In my nation. In so many places I see the my world missing out on its potential because I have been missing out on mine. Even now that I am rebuilding so many pieces of my life, I still have so much more work to do because of the work I didn't do when I was being less than me.

And I see this all over in so many areas. The tendency is to lower one's self to match the company we have instead of finding new company. By halting our own growth we are validating the stagnation of the people around us. The saddest part is saying we believe in abundance and growth and not allowing our own self to grow. Our world won't grow if we don't.

So I commit myself to growth so whole hearted that many associations will pass away to make room for new company. I'll get out of my own way so that the people around me can grow on their own. Don't worry! I'll leave plenty of bread crumbs and detailed notes along the way.

I'm just going where I should be so that my family, my community, my nation and my country can go where they will be as well.

It's time to break some cycles...

Leave Marshawn Lynch Alone!!!

Most days I marvel at how far I've come at remaining calm and positive. Except...
...when I'm driving. When I'm driving in LA, I just want to run some of these drivers off the road. I'm fresh in the door from once again contemplating ways to get away with performing the PIT move on a car while doing 70 in the fast lane. LA has some of the most selfish drivers in the city. These drivers want to go 45 in the fast lane because they're text messaging and driving until you pass (or attempt to pass) them. Once that happens, they think it's Fast and Furious and their Toyota Prius is now a 10 second drift car. (Woosah!!!) That was my rant.

This week was pretty good.

I went to the Valley to help Matthew find an apartment. It wasn't that bad. The Valley is still a pit of despair    but I had a good time. AND I escaped. I got to golf and eat good food. And I finally got a wheel alignment!

Je parle francais tres bien!

I love my French teacher. She's my type of hippie. She drinks wine and lusts after MUCH younger men. She's into participation and pronounciation. And because I keep getting As on the tests, I'm excused from doing homework. My type of hippie. As opposed to the ones that smell bad and try to force their beliefs on everyone else. Tres mauvais!

Which brings us to Marshawn Lynch. I don't watch post-game interviews. However, I get to see the highlights online and/or via social media. When I first saw Marshawn Lynch refusing to talk, I thought it was amusing. By this year's Super Bowl, I'm tired of it. Not tired at all of him. I'm tired of the NFL and the press even bothering to try.
And then I found out the NFL is making him speak. WHY???
There  are 56 players on an NFL team. That's 111 OTHER players to talk to other than Marshawn Lynch. Hell, that's about 44 starters. Everyone is not out going. Why worry about 1 man when you have TWENTY TWO starters to choose from on each team? WTF

Marshawn Lynch is not an asshole. He's articulate. He has a good sense of humor. And, most important, he gives back to his community. He has a REAL charity. Not a tax write off like most people. Let him give what he gives in his own way. Fam 1st is much more valuable than any soundbite.

I hope this is not a Craig Hodges situation. The difference might be Lynch's value to the Seahawks. In general, NFL running backs are becoming expendable. Marshawn Lynch is not the typical NFL running back. Beast Mode is real. Marshawn Lynch is ALL the running backs Seattle will need win the Super Bowl. (Prediction!)

But then again, there are 55 other players on the Seahawks and Lynch is only one man. One man who means a whole lot to his community...

So please NFL! Leave Marshawn Lynch alone.

Decision 2015!!!

It's hard to believe three years have passed since Decision 2012. It seems like some much has happened.Either way, election day is upon us again and I have some more decisions to make.

I have been thinking about my dating life since coming back to Los Angeles, it's different than I expected to say the least. I have a lot more alone time than I imagined having when I first left Georgia. And that time has led me to reminiscence over my dating history.

I've been a pretty good boyfriend/partner. I've never cheated. I do flirt, A LOT. But it's probably not in me to cheat. I don't think I have the time.

I've come to realize that no matter how casual the relationship, it's still a relationship and I barely want to sit on the phone and chit chat with my girlfriend, so i definitely don't want to chit chat with a side piece. Think about bootie calls. In theory, it sounds nice. You call at 11:30 (The bootie call hour), ask for some sex, and you get some sex, no strings attached. But there are strings! It's a racket. What they don't mention in the description is the number of calls at 5:30 in the afternoon (or some other ungodly hour when I could be doing something better). They don't mention the inordinate amount of chit chatting that is requisite in a booty call relationship. I'm already trying to minimize the chit chat so side pieces AKA cheating won't work. And I ain't paying....

Hell, I ain't even getting a hotel room, which probably means I"m not going to have much sex at all until I move out of mom's house... SMH. My maximum expenditure in direct relation to sex is condoms. I don't count dates as paying because I usually only take women places I was going to go alone to anyway.

Shout out to the genius who wrote "Dr. J was compelled to say something on this subject because he couldn’t grasp a non paying participant on a date calling the payer cheap. "
Cheap is placing ANY economic value on human interaction. 
But I digress. Back to my decision.


It's simple.
I'm getting married soon. And like Andree told me, I'm not wasting my time.
Men and women have standards they wish to acquire. However, when it comes to dating, they put those standards to the side for some of the most ridiculous dating rules. For instance, I've scanned past a GANG of online dating profiles of women who list  their relationship goals as "casual/nothing serious..." After talking to them though, they want to be married. Why do they do that? That's the rule. Don't seem too serious. You might scare a lot of guys away.
Fuck that.
You want to get married, say so. I'll go out on a limb and guess that every woman only wants to marry one man. Why be worried about scaring away a lot of men? Isn't the goal to scare away most men and filter it down to one? If you want casual, say so. No need to waste time pretending to be in a serious relationship when you may not have time for one.
Be true to your priorities and the Law of Abundance will give you what you want. Fear and dishonesty will bring you the opposite of your priorities. Don't be scared of getting everything you've ever wanted. I've known what I wanted for a long time. I've been told to not pursue it. I've been distracted from what I want. I've been afraid. I missed out on a few good women... So, I'm going to always say I want to be married until I'm married. I'm always going to talk about marriage even after I'm married because my wife and I will always work on our marriage. I'm working on my marriage now alone and, hopefully, my wife is too. And, one day soon, we'll work on it together.

So, since once it's said, I'm obligated to live it. I'm getting married. Soon. And I probably know her already. #nolongerdistracted #focused #brave

P.S. - The wedding's going to be in New Orleans. (Some things never change)