Not Scared

I'm not scared to be alone
I'm scared to be without you
I'm not afraid to pick up the phone
I'm just afraid of not speaking to you

So what do I do?

What I Learner Daily 1-25-10

Connected to the Spirit, my life is in perfect harmony.

Voices in harmony create a delicious blending, a beautiful sound. Hearing it brings pure joy. Conversely, when harmony is off, the imbalance is disturbing.
It is that way in my life also. At times, I may get sidetracked, focused on the ways in which my life appears to be flawed. In that frame of mind, I feel disconnected and discontented. But as I become aware of my disharmony, I can make adjustments.
Just as musicians must listen carefully and bring their voices into alignment to create harmony, I, too, must listen in order to bring myself into alignment with Spirit. When I am in sync with God, harmony is the inspiring result. I am blessed and at peace.

Apparently Colossians Chapter 3 has a lot to offer Christians in the way of instruction. This time the verse was 3:14. See why I just say read the whole chapter! (Two weeks ago it was 3:12)
Let me give you some more as well. Nehemiah Chapter 8. 1 Corinthians Chapter 12. And Luke Chapters 1 and 4.

In the midst of our individual journeys, we will realize that we are all working together in the Spirit. Now, it gets a little tricky here. If we’ve all been studying and practicing, not only should we each be in touch with our own gifts, we should be OK working in conjunction with each other for the greater good of the body of Christ. This may be the final frontier. We are all so easily connected nowadays. Then why is it so hard?
The Master Key System insists you not read ahead in order for the system to work. Perhaps, we should do the same. The hard part in living harmoniously is finding your place in the universe. Quite a few of us have skipped that part. In becoming Christian, we want to pick and choose. Most of us want to be Apostles, Pastors, or Deacons. A few (I hope a miniscule amount) want to walk on water. And still some are just lost with no idea. If you incorrectly choose or never find out at all, you’ll end up a leach, parasite or cancer in the body of Christ. Worse, you may become a hater.
So I say here, on this monument to codependence and nosiness, be alone sometimes. The first lesson in The Master Key System is just to sit in silence for 15-30 minutes. (I’m still working on it. It’s as hard as hell.) You can think what you want but you can’t move a muscle. I’m nearly there but it’s been over a week. I can see the point may be to gain focus. I can also see how far I have to go. [There are like 24 parts]

Be alone in silence sometimes. SILENCE. No music. Not even jazz or gospel. No phones. No PHONES. Shut it all the way off. It’s hard. But it’s only hard until it’s easy.

Then listen for your part. And when you hear it jump in. And once you’re in there, be in there. Be present in what you’re doing in life. Be you and DO you! The more you know how to properly do your own thing, the less like you are to be distracted by others doing their thing. Keep in mind 1 Corinthians Chapter 12. There are WAY more roles for people to fill. Some may not seem as important as others right now. However, the more comfortable you are with yourself and your role in the universe the less you tend to worry about other people’s journey. And only when you are secure with your own progress in your journey will you be able to recognize the harmony around you.
Like my boy Wood just told me – “Get your shit together…” so we can create a beautiful symphony.

The Joys Of Niggardom

Quite often, when discussing niggers and niggardom, I have been overly critical. Let me try a different approach. Let's talk about the benefits of niggardom. When done correctly, a good nigger can lead an easy, responsibility free, and perhaps (in a very few cases) rich life!

Let’s look at just a few of the reasons why niggardom has spread across race lines and even nationality. (Believe me there are French niggers and Australian niggers and even Swiss niggers.) And if you don't believe me -

Jersey Shore Thursdays @ 10pm on MTV.

#1. You don’t have ANY responsibilities.

•  EVEN if you have kids, someone else is taking care of them! You and your kids live at your mom’s, grandma’s, aunt’s, or all the above’s house. You don’t pay bills because you are perpetually “getting on your feet”. [What the fuck does that mean?]

#2. Anything you do is overachieving.

•  You don’t do shit...
  That’s it.

#C. It’s not your fault. They were just hating.

•  The cops were just hating on you when they busted your meth lab. It had to be your beggin ass neighbors, complaining because you went up on the price. So what if the neighbor’s shed on the other side of you blew up mysteriously a few months ago. That ain’t no reason to be snooping around. Trailer parks blow up all the time!

#Last. You don’t have to be on time.

•  This probably derives from not having responsibilities. No one expects you to be anywhere. So why would you get there on time?

Oh yeah. I ain’t stopping. How many people thought this was actually going to be positive? Niggers beware. I’m going harder than ever!

My Resolution

My brain’s been so scattered lately. So many adjustments. A lot of work. It’s all so worth it. I’m loving the pressure and enjoying the rewards! And then comes New Years…

Not being in L.A. had me thinking a bit about change. Now I can understand why we change our clocks twice a year. (It’s agrarian. [All about crops and farming] Look it up!)
But why is it exactly that the beginning of a New Year is the automatic life changing event of the year?

So many of us want to lose weight. Why is the coldest month of the year when you decide to go running? Is that very motivational?

Does it have to do with all the money we waste on spoiling bad children? [Not your children, of course. The other ones!] We feel bad so we have to readjust our lives? We have to reorganize our priorities? Maybe.

And not to hate on our festivities, but how well are we going to be able to hold onto these new habits if spend the night being fake at church or wake up with a hangover in a strange bed? I’m just askin’

Please believe I’m all for change and growth. I’m just a little skeptical on this one. My usual optimism is actually stepping out of the way on it’s on to ask – FOR REAL?

You gonna lose weight, again? You gonna shake them haters after you been drinking with them all night? You gonna start saving as soon as you get that refund check.

A friend of a friend said – “Let Go Of The BS...No Room For It In 2010!!!” @Scherell Irby [I gotta give EVERYONE their citations]. But then I asked myself, how many times have I heard that. Shit, I may have even said it myself! Why is that phrase so familiar? Have we been taking turns saying that Bull Shit for the last 10 years [At Least!]?

Can we stop? Can we make on final resolution? A big enough one to keep us challenged for years to come. Let’s take the pressure off ourselves. We have to lose 30 pounds then keep it off because we don’t want to have the same resolution next year. Then we have to start saving (after we buy Hummer with the children’s o’ so small college fund) and keep that going or else we’ll be broke and overweight. And then we have to keep shaking haters and trying not to meet weird people so we won’t have no haters next December to shake. You feeling the pressure yet? Does it make you want some cheesecake? You wanna go to the bar with some random assed drinking partners from Yahoo Friends? Are you fretting failing at three things and STILL having to come up with an original resolution 3 years from now. Are you imagining being broke, fat, and lonely? You getting it yet?

Maybe it’s just me. I’m a procrastinator. I set my own deadlines and break them. Maybe I need to stop and conform to societies rules on growth. Let me see if I can focus on that. One year to grow. Then another one. Then another one. What if my journey is a lifetime though? (See, I didn’t make it too long!) Maybe I need some Ritalin. PSYCHE!

How about next year, we take the time off to evaluate our progress on our journey. I don’t know about you all but it seems strange to see something not working in February and waiting until December to consider making a change. How about we just celebrate our continual growth? Thinking about celebrating where we’ve been and where we’re going seems a little like having two birthdays but this next New Years will officially be a group thing. We’ll each have our own birthdays then we’ll come together and celebrate each other’s accomplishments.

I think that sounds good. Like I said on New Year’s Eve, if you don’t know that I love you. I’ll spend all year (every year) showing you. So the celebration next year is going to be HUGE. As long as we all commit to loving each other more.

If you wake up looking at your workout gear then look past it to the window and see snow or rain or For The Love of Ray J on TV, don’t get discouraged. Grab the phone and call someone. Tell them you love them and let them love you back. Let’s stop spending our children’s college funds and start a business together. And at some point we all have to meet up and beat up some haters. I have a feeling though, when we get together the haters will magically disappear.

So what do think?

Good idea, Bad idea?