Love (1994)

Current mood: listless
Category: Writing and Poetry

This is from the notebook. I'm inputing all that on the computer now. It's full of older poems and unfinished stuff as well as the new poems I wrote. The last poem I wrote was an unfinished one I was able to finish as I typed it into the computer. Anyhow, all that is to say I have more coming. So old, old stuff. Some brand new and some in between.

AND!!!

Excerpts from my non-fiction. "The Super Senior's Guide to College Living"

Love

No girl has ever touched G-Mac
No girl so far outside the sac

No girl is there in Los Angeles
No girl has me dream of her angel's kiss

No girl has held me without a touch
No girl is in my thoughts ever so much

No girl who never held my hand
No girl moves me to be a true man

No girl has made marriage not far away
No girl has made that tomorrow like yesterday

One girl has really touched my life
One girl even if she can't be mine
One girl is always on my mind
One girl I'll still ask to be my wife

Wow. It's funny how I wrote that line about marriage not being far away 12 years ago. I guess its all relative. I still believe.






i really enjoyed this piece...the only thing i didn't understand was the first two lines. What does "G-Mac" mean? It was too clever to begin with those two lines. Just my opinion...but who am I;-)


It was 1994. I had a million and one nick names for myself. And I don't change my poems. I may write another similar one. That's just how I roll.


I enjoyed the piece; it reflects a sensitive nature, however "negetive". I suppose that's an indication of that "mood" you were in at the time.


Keep reading. I feel like the newer stuff is much much better than the old. I really believed I would marry the girl I wrote this for. I think that feeling only happened one other time. Looking back now...


i have felt this way before and i never want to be married and i'm only 18...


Interesting poem. Not bad.
Janice


Check the better stuff

Fellow Writers

Current mood: impressed
Category: Writing and Poetry

Since I have begun to invite people to my blog, I also have been subscribing to more people's blogs. My MySpace experience has begun to change drastically for the positive because of that. I get to enjoy the work of many, many talented people. Some people have begun to share, who may not have if not for MySpace. I credit my brother for urging me and I had a few poems on BlackPlanet back in the day, but if not for MySpace and you all's comments, I would have never shared this much and been inspired to write more. I really never wanted my first book to be poetry but...the people have spoken.

This is just to emphasize the positive aspects of MySpace. Sure there are all kinds of slutty little kids, wierdos, wackos, Jack-O, pedophiles, nut jobs and pornographers here. But so are there out in the world and worse. I just don't walk down those roads. Anywhere. Its all about the good a thing can do. I focus on that. And when my strength gets week, I have my friends here to help me out. So thank you all. Again for the comments. And for making MySpace so very positive for me. You all are the very best MySpace has to offer.

And to my fellow writers, I have always been wary of the poetry house scene. But if Apache is anything like talking with you, I will see you all there soon. I got the first round. And if not, you all are my scene and MySpace is my personal coffee house. So (Snaps) to you!

Be good everybody.






Its good to have a medium that you can really dive into. I have to say that I wholly enjoy your works, and I feel lighter when I release some of my creative energy and spill my guts for the world to read. This medium allows for a little bit of privacy, even when you are opened up to the whole world wide web... keep up the flow... and (snap), I dig. LOL

You are so right about the positive energy. Since you invited me to join your blog, I have been inspired to begin writing again. Writing is a passion that I have enjoyed since I was just a kid, but the cares of life tend to diminish those little extras sometimes. I haven't posted any of my work yet, but I guess after the new year I'll plan on posting some blogs of my own and hitting a few open mics in the Atlanta area. Of course I'm a little nervous, but I have a talent that God gave to me and nobody can take that away.

So in the meantime I'll keep reading your work and probably join a few other blogs. But be on the lookout for me next year!

Keep up the good work. You truly are an inspiration.

Exactly! You do have a talent and many more. You should share it everyday and in every way you can. MySpace is just one of the ways. I am sure we all look foward to the day you are ready to share with us. Keep it positive.

I am glad that you have been able to use Myspace as a positive experience in your writings....personally I enjoy reading the thoughts and views of people I've never met...it kinda gives you the opportunity to look through someone's eyes from a view youmay have never seen otherwise....so I gues what I mean is keep doing what you do and do it well...life is going to be what you make of it so continue to enjoy, share, and relate.....looking forward to more writings!!

OK...I hate this...I just had all the typos in the world up there...lol...I'm at work...ya know sneaking and stuff, so I just wanted it to be known that I caught my own typos!!!.lol...

What I want

Current mood:Watching the dummy on TV
Category: Life

I want to write a real poem
Something not real short and not real long
Something the somewhat feels like a song
Something people feel they can follow along
And when they do, they feel like they belong
I write from wrongs to tell right from wrong
I try to right the wrong when I write the wrong
Sometimes I fear I write it wrong
At the end of the day
I just want people to get it
I want them to feel sympathetic
I don't want to have to ask them if they dig it
I don't want to come off as overly pathetic
So I try and write and post til people feel it
Then I write some more and more til I have a real hit
I just wanna have mass appeal
I just wanna know what's the deal
I just want you to know if I didn't care
I wouldn't be there
I just would not share
I just like to show how we got there
You know misery loves company
And sometimes I want to bring my whole page with me
Everywhere I go I want to take MySpace with me
I want you all to be comfortable with me
I want to drag yall into trouble with me
That way you all get to learn with me
And then you get to earn with me
A clear way to see
A new way to think
So we all can be
Perfect whole and complete






lol... it was cool until you started talking about dragging people into trouble with you. but i feel you.


I wouldn't drag anyone into trouble with me literally. I meant while they were reading my stories. They could feel like they were getting into the same things I got into in the past.


You have a surreal depth abouth you. It is worhty of acknowledgement and appreciation. Especially because you are so willing to share all the intricacies of what's happening inside you... Don't worry about mass apeal. Those who appeal to the masses fall prey to the masses. Who you are is enough...Be you in all your faults and complexities. Be you and all u are is ENOUGH!!!


Thank you! I know to most people, mass appeal would seem to imply that I would change to fit in with everyone. On the contrary, I notice the most respected people are the people who are never afraid to be themselves. And that is what I strive for.


Good times in the LLC!!! You just earned yourself a drink in Vegas.

All the Girls

Current mood: refreshed
Category: Writing and Poetry

The other thing I wrote is the new poem. This I wrote a few years ago. It fits with my recent experiences in Atlanta.


All the Girls

For all the girls I ever cheated on
For all the girls who ever cheated on me
For all the girls who've ever been in my poems
To all the girls who've ever been sung a song
And all the who've written a poem
I wonder did you ever love me
I wonder if we were ever meant to be
Like one plus one equals three
Eternally
You and me and he is we
Just us three
A family
Ultimately
A dynasty
Going down in history
But now we're just history
No more you and me
Just memories
And an apology
I tried not to lie
Not to make you cry
Only to love you for life
To be your man
I tried
And maybe in trying
I missed my wife
Lost track of my life
Maybe I'll never get it right
A son and a wife
But who said that's right
Billions of sons
Bu only one wife
Maybe they're wrong
And my way is right
What if
Just what if
You could all be my wife
Just you and you and her and I
For the rest of our lives

So I'm sending this kite

To the reasons I write
A new reason to write
My new outlook on life
Instead of doing too much
I can get it just right





I like that poem. I can relate to it whole heartedly.

More For Her/Them

Current mood: exanimate

I am hot on the trail a a new poem about all te girls I let pass me by. There was a break in the action, so I went back to the Blue book. (Its a book I wrote in and I am typing the poetry from it in to the computer so I can compile my book.) What I came across was one more poem for the girl I wrote for before. I began to think (DAMN! I wrote a lot for her!) But then I came to the next poem. I wrote that one for a different girl. And I went back to the time when I wrote it. The girl in the second poem turned up pregnant and left alone since the last time I saw her. At the time, I was afraid of the same ting happening the the first girl ("Something for Her").

All of this ties in to the new poem. It seems like I write the same poems over and over in various ways. I think I keep it fresh and new. And I know I continue to improve. I hope, what the new poem will show is a new way to look at the same topic. But I ramble. Here it is another two for one!
Be good everbody!


For Someone Else's Girl

I am confused because nothing is fa'sho
And I am unsettled by what little I do know
Like knowing that I love you
But I don't know what to do
I am so sure this love is true
But there's something more in this truth
Do I love you as a friend
Or simply as a lover
Or are you the one other who will be there till the end
If so, how can I stand
To be with you after
After longing so much
How did you become so priceless
So compelling to my touch
How do I tell you
And make you understand
How would I even know
You think of me as more than
Any other man
A friend
A lover
Worse, someone plutonic
Or would you make me sicc
And consider me just another…
On down the road of life
Could I be your husband
To my wife
Can I perform for you
I know I can be true
But will I ever do
More than stay confused
Can I face the truth
Would I waste youth
Chasing temporary dreams
Can you mean less than you seem
Are you just another player on someone else's team
Or are you truly clean
Still naïve to all things unseen
And still lacking in finer things
Inexperienced
In the difference
Between love and lust
So eager to trust
Me, he
Anybody
Lucky enough
To be the first
To gain your trust
And the one thing I fear
Is that you will never hear
My voice upon your ears
Ring so true we all come to tears
And let you feel
The emotions I keep within
With my heart in your hand
I hope you'll understand
That through all these years
It's you I hold so dear
And want to be near
I wish I could make it clear
I want to know more than a name
I want to play more than some games
I want to make it plain
I want to be in your like
As I want you in my life
And when comes time to choose my wife
I can look to my best friend
And you will look back and accept me as a friend

Lover

Man

And

Husband





Hoes

Can't treat every girl like a hoe
But every girl I meet turns out to be one
And it sure as hell ain't no fun
Cuz I never got none
I didn't even shoot one
Not even a little bit
Ever slipped out from my tip
Not one drip
But shit
It ain't like I even pursued the butt
I just wanted to gain the trust
But when another comes with lust
Fuck being a goddess, they'd rather be sluts
Not that it was her though I hated
Simply I was totally devastated
That she could have ever mated
With niggas so lowly rated
Who degraded
Frustrated
And demonstrated
They were on some fake shit

Why could they never understand
That a true man
Has no other plans
But to hold hands
Maybe explore mammory glands
But nothing more than
True romance
Cuz a true man
Can wait to lay in the sand
Till he has enough Trojans
To prevent the unplanned
And never has more planned
Than
To be a good man
And will only be a father after a husband






U DID THAT!!!


I like em both, but I like all of ur writings.


Keep it coming Mr. Writer hopefully 1 day I'll get an autographed book of poetry or stories & what nots from you. ;)


I like that you coupled these two poems together. It reminds of how people have the tendency to put the objects of their desire on these uattainable pedestals which in reality, sets them up for failure. That person can never live up to the unrealistic expectations that we set for them. In he end, you feel like a fool for believeing that they coud in the first place.


Awww. You're so smart! Smarty Art!!


The first one was like a sad fond memory of past relationships that seem to have dissipated. This is so true, the fear, trust, dreams, and reservations that drive our relationships to success or failure...
The second one was a little shocking. Almost like they don't fit together. But still true, as I think many men resort to categorizing women as whores when we move on.


I never knew people would see the second one that way. I never wrote about any woman who moved on. I almost exclusively write about women desire or desired to be with and never did. I have written a few for women I actually dated but its rare that I would do that. But interesting comment. I do feel that way. My feelings were hurt when I saw the inspiration for "Hoes" had become yet another single mother.

Christine

Category: Writing and Poetry


Story for Christine

There was a bird
No one knew what kind
But you knew it was a bird
Even if you were blind
What you wouldn't see
If you could see
Was just how ugly a bird could seem
This bird was mean
And some parts were green
And some more were unclean
If you had ever seen
A dream like this
You would let out a scream
And wake up quick
Because the bird was sick
But no one noticed
Who would care to take care of it
How many would even dare to sit
With this bird who could make you itch
There were those
Who chose
To take this chance
Do a little dance
And get in the pants
They would never get enough
Cuz even though the bird didn't look rough
It was real tough
But its life was being spent
Real quick
Until a blind man found it
The man cared for birds
And to this one he gave all his love
The bird showed what it was really made of
The bird was actually a dove
The man wondered what he was blessed for
It was because
He gave respect
And didn't wonder what would happen next
He just made sure
To right all the wrongs that happened before
And made a beautiful future
Forever more






I like the rhyming. It is nice. And I like the moral too! Good job.

who's christine?

Its not important. It is actually the person's real name.

forevermore?

tha's so RAVEN... lol wait.. that's a disney show...oh well. i was thinkin edgar allen poe.

well done.

rather simple in structure.. but.. hey.. mission accomplished. .

Finally the comment. Thank you buddy. I was going for the Raven thing. And I do wish for more complex structures at times, but whatever comes out is what I use.

i like the poem & its not too complicated 2 understand ;)

That's what real love is all about. I don't know who Christine is, but good for her.

Christine was a dream that never came true

Old, old, OLD Stuff

Current mood: relaxed
Category: Writing and Poetry



These poems are from 1992! I just wanted to gauge where I've come in all those years. I need input on these compared to the new stuff.



World Hear My Silent Cries

The sullen Giant, standing among small trees
Watching life; please, let me in, please

Bending down to listen or admiring a flower
My enjoyment and pleasure last less than an hour

Forced alone away from the world
If only my hair wasn't so dryly curled

And could have a nice wave
Or even lay straight
Missing memories I'd like to save
Hope I'm not too late

So is weak; not a good ending
In short, in brief are better conclusions
To express the message I'm sending
I don't care about ignorant dillusions

It ain't over; no not just yet
I'd like to tell you; I like a bet
Lucky dice; I have two sets
Best of luck, I never let them see me sweat

Got many lines just need one gut
To stop feeling sorry and eyeing your butt
Trip on my tongue and hear you say - what?
If life was a movie I would say - cut!!!

Gained so much wisdom it caused me the blues
Integrity and honesty are not good virtues

Those who like lies and deceptions
End up alone in their natal conception

Unwed with child and small income
Missed the bus to Kingdom come

But even still he's so fine
He don't even need a mind
Not important to be real kind
All that matters is a cute behind

Trapped alone in solitary confinement
Nothing to do but enrich my mind with;
Books
And looks
Learned how to be a crook
Count all the stuff I ever took

Now lets calm down with a final resolution
Think its time to come to a conclusion

Love of my life
Will be my wife
Yet fear of rejection cuts like a knife
'm looking forward towards jobs and domestic strife

This is the end
Are you my friend
Now hear the message that I send
Beware of boys who act like men

See! I warned them! All the way back then. I was still a virgin and everything. Not even in High School yet. I only have these two poems by luck as I lost an entire notebook filled with poetry in high school. (Westchester to be exact) I know some LaDera niggah was gettin much lovin from my stuff. But I won't dwell.

Here's the next one:

Love #1

There's a place in my heart
Where all my valuables are set apart

It feels so good when you touch me there
No not there, above my underwear

Somewhere just below my chin
Somewhere deep, deep within

I might let you in, but you must swear
Swear on love, say you really care

Once I let you in, what're you going to do
Are you going to love me, will you be true

How long will it last
Will it last more than a few days
You don't even have to ask
I can love you a hell of a lot more than 69 ways


I actually got an A on the first one. It was for an english class. The reason I was sitting all alone is because I was on punishment for not wiriting the poem on time. Well, that was a fun trip down memory lane. Tell me what you think guys








You asked me to comment on one of your blogs, so here it goes. This is a poem I wrote not to long ago for a special friend. I think Imma post as a blog on my page. Let me know what you think.
But be nice. In the words of Erykah Baud...I'm an artist, so Im sensitive about my shh...




Before I slept
I spoke your name


Barely audible
Only a whisper


My lip moved slightly
less than a pulse


The faries and love angels
very nearly caught the wish
heard the prayer


Before I closed my eyes
I thought a thought
not quite a thought
dare I dream of you anymore...


All but hope I retire this night
less than a dream
in a drift


each night less and less




Before I slept...
I spoke your name
but this time, just barely.
Keep on writing. I really am feeling Love . 1. If only...


Peace & Blessings Digits

Passing Me By

Category: Writing and Poetry


Passing me by

I'm deathly afraid to write this
But in spite of this
I continue to type this
This flow goes on and on
For I don't know how long
I'mma just ramble
Until I form a flow
Because I write about something I'll never know
And I know you'll probably want to know
Who this poem is for
It's for everyone
All your special girls
You came into my world
And just as quick became my past
This is for the questions
I was never bold enough to ask
At the coffee shop
Or in that morning class
I couldn't get it together
In time enough to ask
So appreciate the moments
Even though I let you pass

I saw your smile
And I know you saw mine
We may have even chatted
While waiting together in line
I think back and wish
I could have told you you were fine
Now all I have is memories
Of when your attention was all mine
My mind was racing so fast
And its just now slowing down
Times like this I wish
Our conversation was still going down
The things I would say now
Knowing then what I know now
Wishing then that I knew how
How
Do I catch you on your way to pee
Standing hiding somewhere he can't see
Chatting discussing life and possibilities
But how do I grab your attention like you grabbed mine
How do I let you know you're one of a kind
You got in with just a look
You're in my world because now I'm hooked
What I write for you is biblical
A book of books
A coulda, shoulda, woulda in case I get a second look
And it would be a lot
Dang near all I got
My second and best shot
And its still hot
Because my fire still burns
My heart still yearns
But the world just turns
And everywhere I turn
I continue to learn
Change, grow and earn
The wisdom to discern
How
Do I know I will see you again
Hopefully, on MySpace you'll be a friend of a friend
But then I see your face and I don't know if I can
I mean I know I can because I'm that man
But how do I make sure the timing's right
When can I bring my intentions to the light
Don't want to cause undue fright
Don't want to cause sudden flight
I just want you to stay
I just want another chance
What is there to say
What will make this last
I just wanna make the right play
How do I stop repeating the past
Why does this keep happening
To me repeatedly

I could say it was fine
But then it stays on my mind
You catching my eye
You being THAT fine
So fine you shine
Too fine for lines
So why waste your time
I'm not ready to make you mine
But I still want to try
So while I straddle both sides
I pray for more time
Just stay for this rhyme
And see what we'll find
And I promise I won't hide
Even if I have to cry
Because
My life is living to let you pass me by

A Village

Current mood:Reflective
Category: Writing and Poetry

It takes a village to raise a child
We did it perfect
We skipped the pain of life
And raised him straight to heaven
We found the recipe
We added our own unique gifts
And it worked
He lived through death
We gave him life
-Eternally
Now we know the secret
The secret to life
And we will share it with all who ask
When they ask how we made an angel
We will say-

We did not make him for ourselves
We made him for God
He was made without sin
We was entirely good
We left out our worst
And only used our best
Each and every one of us
We gave him the best we had to offer
And forgot the rest
And it worked
He was created by a miracle
Now hes a blessing to us all
Now we have our own angel
And the miracles will never end

So now when people ask-

How we created a miracle
How we made this angel
How we so imperfect
Made something so perfect
How we so impure
Made something so pure

We simply tell them-

We were a family
Who became a community
Who became a village
And we all used love





tight to death!