It’s Complicated

I’ve heard it before. Mostly I’ve seen it online. I’ve been picking up girls/women online since the late nineties. I can remember the first time I saw “it’s complicated” as a relationship status. I’ve been wondering since that day what’s so complicated about relationships.

            It’s been quite a while. This week was the first time I actually sought to find out about it. I got a little more than I expected. A little.

           

            Below is my request and some responses:

My name is Jason. I am writing an article on the "it's complicated" relationship status. Would you be interested in sharing a little bit about your relationship status? Please. I can and will keep everything you share anonymous. I just want to talk to real people and real relationships.

Female 30 GA

·         whats there to say we live together but he says we not together dat  im just his right hand gurl

·         yes i pretty much have gave up on tryn wit him cuz he says every thing is my fault but whatever on dat.... i gotta sneak around n do me cuz he likes to trip.. even though he told me dat he dont want any other guy to have me eather i guess

·         (Does he date openly?) nope not dat i kno of

·         its my place its in my name so im not goin any where (to Is moving out difficult?)

·         idk (Is there any hope of reconciliation)

·         (Do you ever think he’s using you?)kinda but he does pay all da bills

·         (It’s a good arrangement except for dating?) yeah to a point

·         we still have sex n sleep in da same bed

·         naw we always use protection cuz he not ready for kids.... if we dont have it then we dont have sex

·         no but i hope it does[change]... bn safe we have bn together off n on for 2yrs... we use to not use any thing till he got wit a whore when we broke up n she gave him a std n ever since then we use protection

·         da only advice u could prob give me would b run his ass off n move on

·         all i gotta say he wont leave so im doin me since he dont wanna b wit me ill find love one way or the other

Female 39 Tustin CA

here is my version of the status....in my mind i am doing the right thing and walking away from the start of a relationship that i see is really too complicated on his side.  Its a guy that didn't  do the right thing by ending his old relationship before starting with me so of course there is fallout and not something that i respect on his part.  At the end of the day I am just not feeling the situation either.   Ok so thats whats complicated....lol.  I do like the fact that the status keeps the stalkers away 

(So just so I'm clear. You did try to have something with a guy who was "having trouble becoming unattached", but you gave up. And now you just leave the status because it's a bit of a filter. Did I get that right?

But I do also read inside that, you still have some feelings for this guy. What about that?)

so far u have everything right....now about the feelings.. I am happier out of it than in it so its a wrap.

Female 28 Overland Park KS

 I don't have a problem sharing. My relationship is complicated because my bf is in prison. I haven't fully made the decision if I should stay or go. I thought complicated was the most acurate description.

Female 33 TX

well my its complicated is not because im in a relationship.....at least I don't think im in one anymore....so Im not sure If I can help you out.   Im still legaly married, over a year now...he refuses to divorce me and I don't have the money to hire a high priced attorney.....we were together for 13 years and even though I know no one will ever love me as much as he does, or do for me like he did.....the love is lost.

I have currently entered a long distance relationship/friendship with someone I went to high school with but never knew when I was in high school, I would love to be with him but.....the distance is a big issue, that and the trust issues i have from my past. Im not prepared to move back home, and although he says will move here its a big step and im not sure how serious he is

its over with my husband......with the guy from high school, I would consider it some kind of relationship

I guess the hardest part I have with the whole distance thing, is it makes me feel abnormal......I don't get why I can't find someone in my own hometown that wants to be with me but someone 1400 miles away is the first person I hear when I wake up in the morning and the last voice at night and wants to be with me......

yeah, i try to hold my head up high on that one, but he acts crazy....the last guy i was talking to before I met my guy.....dumped me after finding out all the drama I still had with the ex....I was on the phone with him and then my ex called my sons phone and I thought I put him on hold.....when the ex told me he went and clamed the kids on his tax return, when he didnt even help me last year I fliped out.....the guy told me "i didn't know you had issues like that, im out" LOL I told him if he had taken a min to ask me how my relationship was with my kids father he whould of known and deleted his #

yea.....IDK, didn't think he was right for me anyway. But I was kind a like WOW your breaking up with me over that???

I think I have it together, I know I make bad choises when it come to men, but what I learned in the past year is as much as I want a relationship, I don't need one...Im blessed I can do for my family and take care of them...Im not the richest person in the world but I make a good enough living to keep my self above water, I have goals, im still young, and I have a bright future ahead me..... =D

i told him i would move back to miami, if I could sell my house. THE PROBLEM......homes are not selling here in San Antonio

Dawn M(Female) 50 Palm Bay, FL

Hello jason. Haha. Well its complicated no more! It was-but i left him and moving on! Take care n good luck with your research!

Latina 52 San Antonio TX

honestly i dont know if i am still in a relationshi.   i have not seen him in 5 weeks......whats complicated?  he puts everyone and everything before me

So do you want to be in a relationship with him still and do you think he does as well?

yes i still do and so does he but i thnk i am ready to move on

yes but he keeps avoiding me.  but he tells me he loves me......  wow

i've asked for my house key but he avoids brining it to me

How long have you two been dating?

7 months

yeah i do but how do you know when it its? (Do you have a limit?)

last week he told me if i wanted my key i had to come get it but i couldnt go at the time so now it likes he wont come by and return it.  Its like he is holding on to it to keep a hold on me?

so i guess i need to set my limits huh?  and you r so right, its women like us who do all the right things and we get taken for granted.......

Female 28 Hokinsville KY

Complicated 4 me means I hav a live in but he's not my boyfriend but he wants 2 b but he is my friend

We tried but it didnt work I don't want 2 go bck down that rode again but he's blockin my life a lil ya know

Just friends(started out)

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!(children?)

Don't really knw[what’s next]. don't want 2 put him out and no where 2 go. But I don't want 2 keep feelin like I can't do in my own house either! What's a girl 2 do! I guess I'm just 2 nice

Female 40 Fort Wayne IN

i met a man we started dating and became srious for five years then he started drinking cheated and i tried tellin him to stay away from me and he said how sorry he was and how much he loved me so i still see hom even thoigh he doesnt allow me at his home because of the secrets he has going on. another skank and two baby mommas he doesnt sleep with the baby mommas but the skank im not sure about we have been together for seven years and 2 have been complicated when i try and leavee he cant stay away for more than 7 days

not taken (Do you date other people?)

sometimes lol its(dating) complicated

i believe that if he is meant to be with me he will see that i am a good woman and come to his senses but who knows what the future holds

what next 29

Well I can start with I am legally married and have been for the last 9 years, but we have been seperated off and on since 2008.  We have filed the divorce papers and are awaiting a court date.  He is currently seeing another woman back home where we are from and I can honestly say that I really don't mind, just wish her the best of luck!!!!         If there is anything else you want to know just ask.

Yes we still talk but only of the childern. No I don't hook up, I really have not thought of dating I just want the divorce to be over with and then someday I might think about dating.

And my lone brave male!

Dustin D Ypsilanti MI 26

yep yep ! my relationship is a im sry i won't do this or that naggin n bitchin anymore..then bam happens again and again sucks rt

yes but we never stop living together  n 6 years 

YES WE GOT A SON TOGETHER AND NOPE SHE DONT WANNA I DO 

As you can see, there are some interesting and disparate stories here. Unfortunately the men didn’t step up. Thankfully, the women were honest and open.  I saved the last female’s story because hers was the most compelling.
            She asked me to call her. I hesitated but quickly found out why it was worth it to call. Below is her story. Because of her situation, I can’t tell you much about her identity. You’ll see:

Female 38

“It's too much to type and what paper or magazine do you work for or is this just a project”

 I sent her a link and my phone number. She responded with hers. I was determined to call so I set a reminder to call her within two hours. This is her story:

She was married 11 years. She’s been separated for 1 year. He doesn’t know. He knows they have problems, but he hopes they stay together. She wants a divorce but she’s scared to tell him where she lives because he’ll make life hell. They’ve tried to work it out 2/3 times. As of now, he thinks she’s looking for a place for them to stay. She intentionally let their lease lapse and told him they had to find somewhere else to live.

            The relationship is abusive, physically and verbally, “He’ll hurt me” “Not attracted to him” because of the abuse. He’s jealous of her financial responsibility. He gave up “the life”/hustling and now struggles. He’s unhappy with his life choices. So, they argue, he get’s violent.

She lives in one state and he lives in the state next door. He’s not from either. She’s hiding from him and still dating.

“It helps” but “I’m going to hell” because she’s still married. She cheated two years ago (that’s one year before the ‘separation’. She’s scared of Tagged. She still dates the guy she cheated with, but she can’t give her all because of this situation.

She’s embarrassed because family warned her. And after all this, she’s still “confused”. She thinks about going back but knows she “Can’t change him” Deep down she knows it’s not going to work.

These women should show us how issues get tangled and twisted and complex when we let things build up instead of dealing with them. All of these “relationships” started simply and then the issues came. As I spoke with these women, I would notice one issue that seemed simple enough and, immediately, that one issue would get entwined with another simple issue. And then another, and another… And there you have it! A complicated relationship.

                      I’ll speak for the men and say that everyone is looking for Love. These “complicated” relationships are just one extent people will go to in order to find it. Let these women serve as warning. Relationships are simple. Life is simple. Love is powerful. It can all become complex if we let them.

What I Learned In Church 3/4/12

Today we read: Genesis Chapter 22, Romans 8 and Mark 9. In these chapters we examined Abraham's faith, Paul told us “If God is with you, who can be against you?” and we witnessed The Transfiguration. We should know Abraham’s story. He was impatient so God put him to the ultimate test. He had to wait until he was 100 years old (exaggeration) to have children. Then he was asked to make a sacrifice and he offered up his only son who he waited nearly a century for… Some of yall don’t even like your kids and you wouldn’t give them up like that. Even for God. And that’s how he got his blessing.

            Fast forward a few generations. God gets tired of the endless cycle of messing up, punishment, forgiveness, trials, blessings… God says- let’s skip a few steps. Hey Jesus! Come do me a favor… Now we have an example of perfection to strive for and endless do-overs. And then theirs is the power. “If God is with you, who can be against you?”  No one!

            Lets look back at the example in the flesh. Two of the three men who went straight to heaven come back to chop it up with Jesus. That’s the power that is available to us and Peter wants to put Jesus, Elijah and Moses in boxes. God's power is limitless. Why do we always try to put the limitless inside a box.

            My boy Robert says it this way, If you didn't understand #TheMatrix the first time you watched it, you're a fucking idiot or at the very least you have ADD or ADHD or OCD.

            I’m a little bit nicer but, the sentiment is still the same. When you truly understand what it means to have access to limitless power, the sky is the limit. If you are still limiting yourself and/or God, something is wrong.

            I see a lot of people who “know the bible” but still live within limits. Something is wrong. We have a mental disorder or like Robert says… dee-deedee!

It’s simple. "Listen to God"   Trust what you hear from God. If you are having trouble, now is the perfect time to give up some stuff/distractions so you can hear. I believe in us. We can do it.

What I Learned Today

Woke up feeling well. I walked for an actual hour today. I got some lemons. LOVE lemons!

I’m still recovering from staying up all night on Sunday so I fell asleep for a while today.

            I got quite a bit typed today and posted a blog. That was wonderful. My father made my Step-mom some “Clipper” shoes on Nikeid.com They were cool. She loved them. Then I learned Aunt Connie died today.

            Aunt Connie was very close to my Step-mom. She lived in Brooklyn and I only met her once when I was very young but my Step-mom and Aunt Connie were very close. My family doesn’t handle death well but my step-mom does the best with it. There were some family issues, however. And the funeral will probably be in New York. So there’s stress right now. Somehow it got to me.

            I have my own stress. My phone is off till Friday. I’m working to get in touch with my probation officer to at least keep him in a good mood but more so to get my probation transferred so I can be officially done with Georgia. And I am still looking for a job or any way to generate a positive cash flow and still be able to write.

            I’m working on my focus. It’s strong, at times. It could definitely be better. I have a pretty good head start on my mastery of this writing thing without school. But I still battle internally with feeling like an outsider no matter what I do. Distraction is a BIG issue. I want to let my mind wander. I make connections that way. But I don’t want to lose focus. That happens too!

            I nearly lost focus.

            I’ve haven’t been home three months yet and SMH. I wanna burn some sage in here! I don’t even believe in all that but goddamn!

            Since I don’t have any sage, I went to Tony Robbins. I’m on Day 7 of a twenty day program. I did Days 5 and 6 today. I have the time. I wrote while I listened. It helped. And it just so happened that during my reflections it occurred to me that I like to do things all the way. I don’t like to be just acquaintances. If I like a girl I go all the in. No dibble dabbling. I like to hurry and get to the REAL intimacy. If that includes poking, so be it. When it comes to relationships and being intimate, I’m all the way. I’ve only ever had one one-night-stand and I probably know more about that girl than most people know about their “girlfriends/boyfriends” after a few months. (AND I’m only exaggerating a little bit!) I consider all of my male friends best friends. And I can’t throw away food.

            I don’t like trying. So I’m doing well with Tony Robbins. I’m motivated enough to want to change so I’m doing ALL the steps. He mentioned doing it all the way if it’s worth doing.

            All that made me realize that I am a doer. I’ve just been doing a lot over these years. I was truly spread too thin. I have a bunch of projects started and not many finished. And I haven’t given up on any of them. So, YES, I am insane! If I had hair.

            But like I said before, I am gaining more and more focus every day.

            Today I decided the order of books will be 1. Chasing The P  2. Welcome to Jail and 3. What I Learned in Church. That’s based on primarily on ease o completion. God willing, all three and the others will be completed within a short time of each other. The other reason for choosing to make that book a priority is that I like it. It’s where I am right now. I’m at a cross roads. No matter where I go from here, I need to close the book on the past.

            So that’s it, I’m still working to control my focus. I’m doing pretty well. I’m choosing to be happy. The following blogs that aren’t WIL in Church or this journal should be about Chasing the P with a few sprinkles of Jail.

            Looking forward to what the future holds and thankful for these days.

My Letter To my Probation Officer

Some people know I am on probation. And a few know I am currently working to transfer my probation to Los Angeles. As part of sharing the new blog, I am sharing all the important stuff. I recently emailed this letter to my probation officer.

Attn: Israel Fowler, Lawrenceville Probation, Supervisor

My name is Jason Sloan.

I heard your message today when my stepmom came home and checked the messages.

I am writing you as a prelude to calling in. I would like you to have some information. My phone number is 323-293-7555 I live at 4150 w60th street, Los Angeles CA 90043. That is the house phone with no voice mail. I have a Boost mobile phone 323-710-7428.

I have been at this address since December 9th. My house in Stone Mountain is destroyed and uninhabitable. That is easily verifiable through just the most superficial of inspections. There is no electricity since a tree fell on the power lines. There are no water pipes since they were stolen. Neither I nor my family have the means to repair that at the moment.

I am still looking for employment. My carpentry has been going VERY slow. I haven't even been able to give away free work. I am certain that I will be emplyed and able to catch up my payments soon (the next six months). I do expect to be able to do more inn the next two weeks but I can't promise anything since my situation is not stable.

I would very much like a transfer to California probation. I did not plan to do things this way at all. My plans included returning to Stone Mountain and waiting until my transfer went through to return to Los Angeles.

My brother's house is full with 9 adults in a three bedroom house.

I know this is not an ordinary situation. I am not your ordinary probationer. I refuse to resort to associating with any of the people I used to associate with, even the ones who weren't criminals. Not because I was in the habit of committing crimes but because I refuse to be connected in any way with people who are not fully within the law. I can and will succeed on this probation. Your support is greatly appreciated. I know you have done a lot already. Just a little more please?

Sincerely

Jason Sloan

What I Learned This Weekend 2/27/12

What a weekend!

I guess it started Friday. I was getting ready for my writers group meeting on Saturday. You know, pretending I did everything I said I would do a month ago at the last meeting. (Just being funny) The only thing I didn’t do was keep up with my writing log. I started it but then I kept writing/researching without logging it.

            I was aware of it though. I realized the value of my research time in The Think Tank. The Think Tank was a gift from God. In addition to The writers group that I can walk to once a month, I have this wonderful group on my favorite website where I can talk about things that matter. We talk about the stuff I write about and the opinions are very diverse. I get new perspective on my articles and new topics to write about.

            Also, some old topics come up. Sometimes there are topics that I have overlooked or ignored. This week, the issue of domestic violence came up again and again. I had written a blog about domestic violence posed as a letter to a girl I was interested in. In the letter, propose that since her current boyfriend beats her, I can beat her better. It derived from a play on the word beat (Violence) and beat (Sexual). It evolved into the letter as it is now.

            The funny thing is, it was written almost a year ago while I was in jail. Right after I got out, the person in question added me a friend on Facebook. Or so I thought. It took attempting to share with my writers group. Sharing the letter with my step mother, some shit chat with my dad and a separate inspirational message from Tony Robbins to convince me to give away the fear and just do what I know to – write.

            Turns out it wasn’t the same girl. (I think) Either way, I’m willing to give up myself in order to start the dialogue up. And I think I did that.

            Sunday was the best. THE BEST!

            I felt a way about skipping church but I felt something good coming. It started early. As I was sprinting down the street on my daily ‘hour of power’, my dog Angel went a little crazy and tried to run across the street. My attention was diverted to two men. One seemed I little familiar. Upon slowing down, I realized it was one of my best friend’s Scooter standing in front of his in-laws’ house. So we reconnected. I lied and told him I forgot his number. The truth was I hadn’t gotten a call back from him in so long (years) that I didn’t bother to call when I got back. I sent him a text message after the run so he would have my number. He actually sent me a text back before I left for my later engagements so that was good.

            Then I was supposed to borrow some clothes from Mike so we could go out later. As it would turn out, my dad came with two beautiful shirts he couldn’t fit but that fit me well! I asked about some shoes and got blessed with some nice wing tips. The day was getting better.

            I got to watch my sister and niece playing video games together. They spend a lot of time together but something about Super Mario on Wii that makes me feel a way. A good way! THEN I got to hang with my boys Seth, Greg and Mike.

            Greg picked me up so we could go support my boy Seth’s latest promotion. On the way to the bar, I picked up a suit and another shirt from Mike’s. It was a wonderful gathering to watch the NBA All Star game. Being around a lot of former acquaintances, good, legitimate ones, made the All Star game viewable. Then I got to catch up a bit with Seth and Greg. That was REALLY the best part of watching the All Star game. I am slowly settling down back into L.A. and I’m loving it!

            So everything worked out. Mike ended up at a party on the same block I was on. Talk about stars lining up. I threw on a sport coat and transferred my extra, just in case, gear to Mike’s car. Then we caught up with another Xavier Alumn at the W. There was a cool vibe. One woman caught my eye but she was with a douche bag. I got to sit for a minute which was glorious! as I had been standing up in shiny shoes for a few hours. After a bit of chit chat with Mike, we decided on gong to the Maxim party.

            The Maxim party was in a Mansion above Sunset. There was a shuttle to the party. Mike and I anticipated a little finagling to be able to get on the shuttle. As good fortune would have it, the only trouble was the LONG assed wait to get on the shuttle. It seemed the entire party showed up at the shuttle stop at the same time.

            Eventually, we made it on the shuttle and to the party. It, was, all, worth it! We immediately forgot the wait. Not only were we around a few of the most beautiful women in L.A., we were surrounded by some of the personable. And there was an open bar which meant all the caffeine I could handle.

            I could go on about the party but let me just say it was worth not going out much if that type of party is where I end up. I got home at 5. I was so tired/wired I locked my sister out and fell out, then when she woke me up at 7 am I could barely go back to sleep. (Barely being able to go back to sleep for me is like not being able to sleep at all for a normal person) My feet still hurt at 11:35 the next night. And it was all worth it. The whole weekend!

            It was a glimpse of what life can and will be like being back home and I’m in Love all over again. I’m in Love with writing. I’m in Love with life. And most of all I’m in Love with LA. L.A. means more than some streets and clubs. L.A. is my family, my friends, my life. Everywhere that I’ve been and everywhere I’m going is all about L.A. That’s never changed. I just needed this weekend to remind me.

            I’m LA! I’m home! That’s it. It’s going down! 

You’re A Crackhead

      I used to assume people were on crack based on their behavior…

            Now I see addiction is one behavior all to itself.

            As I explore my life, I realize. I’ve always been an addict. There was always something I’ve been addicted to. When I outgrew one thing, I shifted to another. My adult life has always been an exercise in impulse control. What is amazing is, in writing this intro, I discovered a seamless shift between my two major vices, both of which center around one fixation.

            As early as I can remember I sucked my thumb. My parents started trying to talk me out of it early. I also had a pillow similar to Linus’ blanket. My mom even tried to sew a different cover on the pillow to hide it from me. The attraction wasn’t visual though. With the pillow, as well as the main fixation, it was sensual. I loved the feel of the fabric inside the pillow. I would pull and rub it through the outer material and that friction and sensation were incomparable. I even found an alternative inside certain jacket/coat pockets as well as my comforter. I was able to abandon the pillow and go mobile. I don’t know if there is a causation but the “pillow” habit does correlate with me not masturbating until I was 18.

            The attraction to sucking my thumb was oral. Nothing persuaded me to stop. Nothing! At 13 I just stopped. Around the same time, I started drinking on the weekends. I’m sure there is a correlation. I never stopped drinking. Nothing could change that.

            As I became a person who questions my motivations, I began to see patterns which paralleled addictive behavior. My eating became habit. Although I enjoy a wide variety of foods, I found myself sticking to one or just a few meals. My comfort foods are foods of habit. Even now I’m in the middle of a love affair with peanuts. My effort must go into ignoring peanuts sometimes just so that I can eat other foods and not peanuts all day.

            Then there is my greed. I can only eat just one Lay. But I don’t want to! I want the whole bag. No matter what size, I must practice putting it down. If I like it, I want it all, all the time. (And I’m good at it too!)

            And that is addiction; habit and greed.

            Only my sensuality and oral fixation saved me from smoking. I never enjoyed the way cigarettes made my mouth feel. Plus, the need for sensation had me inhaling deeper and deeper. Soon I was carrying Listerine and gum 24/7 and brushing my teeth ten times a day. I was a bachelor. I couldn’t be caught unprepared to kiss. And I didn’t want to limit myself to other smokers, although I was more than ready to exploit their oral fixations. And the cigarette butts everywhere and the smoke…  no tanto sexy!

            So over 30 years after I first picked up my pillow and popped my thumb in my mouth, self examination has me practicing self control and asking myself which habits to keep. Labeling myself as an addictive personality, I wonder what it really means to be an addict.

            People are addicted to so many things: drugs, work, sex, money, naked-dick sex, sex, gambling, gossip, negativity, positivity, church, coffee, cigarettes, bacon, Oprah, did I say sex?, sex (just in case)… What is it that connects all these people? And when does one become that all encompassing addict – a crackhead?

            At some point one thing takes top priority and spreads the gap between first priority and second priority so far apart that someone who meets you will make no other assumption except – You are a crackhead.

            It’s no secret, when it comes to DUI’s, I’m 5-0 – no convictions. (Update: I'm 5-1. I suffered a forfeit.) I still had to go to AA meetings. They didn’t take. Not that there is anything wrong with AA or it’s steps and traditions. It seemed every time I went, I couldn’t connect with the people telling the stories. There were absolutely no similarities. All those people smoked crack. Even if they didn’t say so, no drinker could possibly do or go through the things they talked about. Plus, alcohol’s not the gateway drug, weed is. That’s DARE 101. I didn’t have anything in common with a crackhead

            That was denial. My ego was fighting hard to keep me comfortable and blind. Only when I abandoned my ego was I able to see that.

            We all tend to view addiction as an extreme only inside the realm of drug use. The crackhead is just the person who is addicted to crack and acts crazy.

But what if (Big IF)

we aren’t addicted to crack and we still act like a crackhead.

What makes a crackhead? Is it only the crack? Could it be more than usual tomfoolery we associate with crackheads?

A confession: I must admit that I am an addict. I first started dabbling in my teens. I would mess around with it then retreat to “safety” before things got too heavy. I carried on this way off and on for years. Things came to a head when I moved to Atlanta. Of course, there was a girl. She turned me out. I had to have more then. I thought about it all the time. I was trying up women left and right. I may have turned a few out. I tried to stay straight for a few years. I even let a few women off the hook to protect them from my addiction. I thought I had it under control. I didn’t. It wasn’t until I submitted to my higher power that I was able to come out of it. Thank God I got out clean. I still struggle from time to time but God is on my side for real!

            Now it is time for me to lay it all out on the table for my family and friends and admit it finally. I am…

This is hard…

…I am…

…an…

…a naked-dicker.

It was hard to admit that. Rock bottom for me was waiting on the results of my AIDs test and reliving my sexual past. I passed. I’m in recovery now. Everyday it’s a battle.

I had to admit that now so that people can truly understand the nature of addiction. You can be addicted to the most harmless things. The addiction and addiction behavior make those things dangerous. Be careful of being an addict.            

            …to anything…

You too may be a Crackhead…

What I Learned In Church:2/18/12

We're going to start something new. It's called getting to the point. Today’s readings come from Isaiah 43, Second Corinthians 1 and Mark 2.

God says, I forgave you and will over and over again. Why are you still tripping? Then Paul says, don’t be wishy washy. It's all yes. Be a yes man. God moves forward not backward. And then Jesus healed the paralytic who was lowered through the ceiling.

And the reason why we are still tripping came to me.

            We're still trying to be like the paralytic. That’s wrong. Our mission is to be like Jesus. A lot of “Christians” don’t read/ignore the Old Testament. The irony is that they all still live there.

            In Isaiah’s time, the Hebrews continually got distracted by sin and fell short. God forgave them over and over but they got so down on themselves that all seemed lost. Then Jesus came! Salvation is available to all. And it’s FREE. Not free like a trial and you don’t need a credit card to sign up. And it’s not going to require you to spend hours looking through offers and pop-ups. And it’s not “The Free Version” just to get you to buy the REAL version. It’s ALL THE WAY FREE. All you need to do is be a yes man like Paul says. And the power is already here. Faith (REAL FAITH) is powerful and as readily available as salvation.

            We’re still hollering Jesus, Jesus save me. You’re saved fool! Get up and move on. Pick up your faith and work. Use your faith to heal your fellow man. Move forward not backward.

We all want "Something new in our lives". Well do something new! Don't be paralyzed by sin. Move forward not backward and DON'T STAND STILL!
(This is where I start cussing.) What is keeping you from God's grace? We've been forgiven. We've been charged to take over where Jesus left off. "Pick up your mat and go home" Pick up your bullshit off the floor. Pick up the anchor/baggage/crutches you've been dragging around and go home. Home is Heaven. Go! It's waiting for you now.

            Don't wait until it's too late. Other people's funerals should make us realize the value of living well now. We should consider where we are going, NOW. Not where we are going in the next few minutes or days or even years. We ask each other about five and ten year plans like that means something. What is your eternal plan? And are you working towards that NOW?
You've been given the power of forgiveness, the power to move on past this world into eternity. When will you begin to use it? Get up off your mat! Go home! Now!